Posts Tagged ‘Arkham Asylum’

Drunkennings #5: Let’s get for-snerious

Posted: February 9, 2013 in DRUNKENNINGS
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Hold on to your sober caps because a new Drunkennings starts in 3, 2, 1: *crsh* Beer-thirty. Okay, now let go of those caps because it kind of defeats the purpose.

Rule #1 of being drunk (which I am not): Do not drunk dial, drunk Facebook, wasted Tweet, or drunk blog (unless you have a website called wordsandslurs.com, which you don’t because it belongs to me. Drunk dialing is really only effective when either you’re the one calling, or both of you are drunk. 3 am is a horrible time to call anyone. Drunk Facebooking leads to being shocked and embarrassed in the morning, and having to delete a bunch of things while hoping that no one saw them (the twelve people who liked it and the eight who commented probably didn’t see anything). Wasted Twitter (a step or two above drunk) is ill-advised simply because of how easy it is to spam Tweets down the throats of your followers on a sober day. Being wasted is like having a blog series where you just write down whatever you’re thinking or feeling while you’re drunk (or getting drunk) and shove it down the throats of your followers. Just don’t. And finally, don’t drunk blog because it’s my thing and I will cut you.

For christmas this year, my sister gave me a pair of pajama pants with gingerbread men on them. Half of them have their heads torn off and it says “Bite Me.” I think they’re awesome and extremely comfortable and I’m wearing them now.

Silence. Silence. Silence. Silence. HA! Silence. Silence. Silence. = Me watching Family Guy.

Arkham City is great, by the way.

After working this food service job, I find that I’m somewhat addicted to multi-tasking. I frequently find something to watch on my computer while I play video games and drink and/or do something else. People ask me if I can honestly focus on everything at once, and I say “Your breath smells of soot and poo, and yes, I can focus on everything. I play the same game all the time, and watch things I’ve already seen or things I don’t really care about.” For example, the other night I was watching a movie on Netflix. It lost my interest, so I whipped out the video games. I still watched the movie, but did I see everything? No. Didn’t miss anything, either. Dumb movie. Lesson here: some movies suck.

HOLY CRAP I just switched games. Going back to some God of War. This is semi-big. Just like….other things…is what she said.

I just laughed at my own joke. That’s our secret, and so help me, if you tell anyone… mmhmm.

Isn’t it crazy how you go back and play your favorite games that when they came out, you thought they looked amazing, but now, they look dated. You don’t really notice the progression of technology, it’s more like things just look better sort of. It’s the comparison that really dates games.

Oh, god. Kratos can roll. Batman cannot. Batman has little spiky dudes above his attackers before they make contact. Kratos does not. — adjustment period.

Stop rolling, damn yoU!

God of War = button mashing, Batman = skills. More or less.

Was just thinking “I need to drink more and faster,” then banged my elbow full-on into the wall and didn’t feel anything…. which confirmed everything? Yes.

You know what God of War and Batman (as games) have in common? Simplicity. The controls are not complicated. A great game has simple controls and an awesome story/environment/story environment. Complicated controls are an attempt to make up for a crappy game. AND WE NOTICE.

The problem with sequels to games is that sometimes you try to do the awesome moves you can do in the sequels, but in the originals, and FAIL. It’s like playing Arkham Asylum and trying to speed grapple, or playing God of War and trying to grapple to enemies and pound them to the floor. Not ON the floor, mind you, TO the floor. Get your mind out of the gutter.

If your mind isn’t perpetually in the gutter, you’re doing it wrong…. I’m doing it wrong.

For the love of the gods, STOP ROLLING!

You know, if my current statistics mean anything, it shows that the Drunkennings series isn’t all that popular. I’d consider discontinuing it, but for such a small readership and for the fact that my website is called WordsandSLURS (the drunken type) leads to shove it all somewhere for a rainy day. You guys sort of like the Disturbed Personas series, and really seem to like the blog posts where I talk about something very briefly. Those factors considered, at almost 800 words, not many people will actually finish reading this post.

If I insult you, it’s only to get a rise out of you. To encourage discourse. It doesn’t seem to work. Well, what you.

Have you read the latest Disturbed Personas? #4? There’s a lot of naughty words. Non-sexual kind. Seriously, you’re depraved.

I miss Arkham.

The best part about getting drunk and posting things on the internet/texting or doing anything is seeing it in the morning, or being told about it, and having little to no memory of doing it. Really, the absolute best part is the whole “REALLY?!” aspect on your part.

Getting drunk and reading about it later really just affirms how crazy you are.

Speaking of which, I never edit Drunkennings. I edit as I go, and anything I don’t catch, well, sucks to your assmar.

Shut up!

I want the stamina of a video game character. They get sliced and diced how many times before they die. One hit kill games suck le balls. They’re not fun. I want a health bar, basically.

Kratos, your sternocleidomastoid is showing. Bahaha.

So 30 Rock is over. I started watching this season, but the early episodes around the election really upset me. Relevance is one thing, beating me over the head with a rubber club is another. If I wanted election coverage, I’d find a way to watch CNN (I don’t have cable). Sounds like it got better. I kind of know what happens because I like them on Facebook.

Excuse me, I have a griffin to beat the crap out of. DIE, you whore!, but don’t die because you’re a whore, die because you crossed me one too many times (in this case, once). Whores are peeps too.

Also, Peeps are disgusting and I don’t know why they’re still manufactured.

I’m not drunk, per say, but my Facebooking is hi-fraking-larious right now. Toot Toot.

I just saw something about writer’s anxiety. Here’s the thing (for me): I don’t have anxiety about writing. I love writing, and I’m going to write whatever the hell I want. If no one reads it, I don’t really care. I don’t write for other people, and I don’t necessarily care if I can make money at it. I write because it makes me happy. To me, the happiness is payment enough, and anything after that is a bonus check (a very highly taxable bonus check).

DAMMIT Facebook, stop autocorrecting my typos. They’re intentional, damn you!

Kratos, you and I are going to have a serious problem if you don’t stop rolling around every two seconds.

Okay, so I quit Kratos and ran crying back to Arkham. At least I went to Asylum. Batman just knows how I like it, and Kratos doesn’t have access to the Joker by Mark Hamill. LOOOOOOOOOOVE it.

Batman vs. glass windows: Oh no you didn’t.

Anyway, g2g and all that snacks,

you made it this far, You’re Welcome (such an arrogant prick am I.)

:)

Could you kill?: philosophical ponderings of the ethically moral mind

Posted: January 24, 2013 in THOUGHTS AND MUSINGS
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Batman Beyond (comics)

Batman Beyond (comics) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Morals. Ethics. Philosophy. What do you believe? What code do you live by? Would you kill for pleasure, glory, or necessity, or might you condemn it all? Would you go so far as pacifism, the refusal to inflict harm? Let me put it in perspective. Batman will injure the crap out of you if necessary, but he will not kill you. He also could not live with himself if he were the cause of an innocent’s harm. What’s his motivator, justice? Revenge? An overwhelming sense of duty after the death of his parents by a violent criminal? How far could you go before you couldn’t help but abandon your morals? Could you, as Batman, continue to put the Joker behind bars, only to have him escape and kill (hundreds) more? How far could you go before you killed (for the sake of justice?) And is killing for the sake of justice truly justified? To what extent do your morals govern how you live? I mean, how tied to your moral code are you? Can you honestly say you wouldn’t kill someone, or should the situation arise that you were put in a position that you could either kill someone or be killed, would you still have the tenacity to remain true to your vow to never kill? Have you even made a vow never to kill?

Think about yourself and your relationship to the billions of other humans around you. Your needs are not paramount, but when is the time to put your needs above others? Is there such a time? And should you continuously put the needs of other before your own, is there a point where the ingratitude of others becomes too much to bear? Is it okay to expect a little return from the kindness that you show the world, or is kindness something expected from you (and everyone else)? If this is the case, we very clearly fail, because one good action in this world does not necessarily beget another. There are people who will bleed you dry if given then chance (because your blood donation could save at least 3 three lives). The pondaries never end. To that extent, does life ever really end? What defines life? Who has the authority to define definitions of this magnitude? Your deity of choice? In the case of Christianity, who is to say that the book you hold so dear is truth? Or maybe it’s the summation (note: not quotation) of numerous individuals sharing a common belief that has been accepted by many. Again, who the hell is to say any of this is true?

What really matters? You. This is the time to be selfish: when it concerns you and only you. “I believe…” Finish the sentence, but know when is the time to say “I” and when is the time to put others before you. Know, however, that you do not have to share you beliefs on any topic with anyone. Your beliefs are your own, and your morals, beliefs, and personal philosophy are the concern of you. This is the one time, I think, to say: “Fuck everyone else.” They need to mind their own damn business anyway.

Expect more on this later. And yes, I’m playing Arkham City, and yes, I’ve been drinking. You can also expect a Drunkennings tomorrow night, BT the dubs (BTW).

P.S. the end of Arkham City is absolutely heartbreaking, especially during the credits. Damn near makes me cry every single time.

The Joker, after emerging from the canal of ch...

The Joker, after emerging from the canal of chemical-waste from Batman: The Killing Joke. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Arkham City: Batman’s Jamz

Posted: January 16, 2013 in PRAISES AND REVIEWS
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Batman : Arkham Asylum

Batman : Arkham Asylum (Photo credit: psygeist)

The year was 2009, and the video game world was being rocked by a game called Batman: Arkham Asylum. For the general public, this was a departure from the reality of the Christopher Nolan reboot and even further from the absurdity of the Joel Schumacher films. It was a Batman they’d never seen before. He resembled the Batman from the animated series, and much of the character design seemed based on or at the very least influenced by the show. This, however,  was a gritty, dark, horror-filled world that Batman lived in, and worse, he was placed at the mercy of his greatest foes when he was trapped in Arkham Asylum overnight. Anything could happen, and anyone could pop out at you. Batman: the Horror Movie. Holy awesome game, Nightwing.

Batman Arkham City

Batman Arkham City (Photo credit: bhautikjoshi)

Fast forward to 2011, to the release of Asylum’s sequel: Arkham City. This game’s environment was more than twice the size of its predecessor’s, and to match the playing field, the story was bigger, the number of villains included was ridonculous, the gadgets and abilities were just what you’d hope and wished for, and the soundtrack was amazing. Never before has a game brought me to near tears, and never have I encountered a game with this much replay value. A number of downloadable content packs were released, including a small expansion called “Harley’s Revenge” in which you get the opportunity to play through the expansion story as Robin (let me also add that never has Robin been so awesome, and that this is also exactly what I wanted after playing Arkham City the first time.)

Over the past decade, the gaming studios have paid increasing attention to a vital part of any game: the soundtrack. The soundtrack may not have the ultimate power to make or break a game, but it can definitely bring a gamer to the brink of playing something else. At the same time, it’s hard to imagine some games without thinking of their soundtracks (Zelda, for example). The main theme of Zelda was simple and extremely catchy. It was also repeated…a lot. Most games used to be underscored from beginning to end…with generally forgettable “music.” But thanks (I venture to guess) to Hollywood’s ever-growing influence, the trend of creating games that looked and felt like movies exploded. Synthesized tunage was no longer acceptable (kiss success goodbye if you try to put that crap in one of today’s game. Maybe if it’s a highly conceptual game, but that’s a major risk). Gamers of today need more from our game soundtracks, and Arkham City delivers.

Check out the game’s epic main theme:

You don’t get that quality from many games!

The entire soundtrack has become an obsession of mine, a lasting one at that. It’s been over a year since I started playing this game and I’m still playing it 3-5 times a week and I listen to the soundtrack multiple times daily. An obsession worth having. Like Star Wars. Star Wars and Batman: Worth the Time, Every Time. The obsession was increased today when I was walking through sleet on the way to work, listening to my jam, as usual, and suddenly I was transported to Gotham City in the winter. The music sounds like a freezing, frenzied wind-blown snow, which is great considering the game takes place in the winter, amongst freezing, frenzied wind-blown snow. Nick Arundel has composed a truly brilliant score to a truly brilliant game, and if you don’t watch or play the game, you should at least check out some more of the songs. Do it, or miss out on life. It’s that serious.